No Food, Just Thoughts.


Sometimes you just know. You know with every fiber of your being.

And sometimes you don’t.

God’s been changing up my “know”
plans so much I’ve grown accustom to being in the dark about everything lately.
For a planner this is an uncomfortable place. Very uncomfortable.

Top that with the comfort of being ‘evenly tempered’ thrown out the window and you have one scattered girl on your hands!

It’s been quite a nauseous ride.


Sometimes…. it’s freeing.
Freeing like the 2nd day of a 2 week vacation freeing.
Freeing like the first jump into a cool pool on a hot summer day freeing.
Freeing like the run that stretches your stride and makes you feel invincible kind of freeing.
(Ok, maybe that last one isn’t as easy to imagine without an ambulance at the other end of it, but you get it.)

It’s nice to be rid of some of the old “knows” and take every step I can possibly muster in faith.

My favorite verse:

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6, 7 NASB)

But lately I’ve been hanging around it’s predecessor.

Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. (Philippians 4:5 NASB)

The Lord is near.
Not far, near.
Right here.
All. The. Time.

This world is harsh. People are harsh. You are harsh. The believers promise of a pain free place is not on this earth.
So many get that wrong.
“Why would God allow (fill in the blank) if He is so loving?”
BECAUSE He is so loving.
He knows our final product. He knows there is A LOT of sculpting to do before His work is complete.
Some of that sculpting hurts. A LOT of it hurts. We are loosing pieces of ourselves to become His masterpiece. A bigger, better idea than we could ever plan for ourselves.

As a parent of 2 teens, and 2 more in the pipeline, there have been plenty of “because I love you too much to let you continue” moments.
Sometimes it includes taking away really great things in their lives. Sometimes it’s not fair.
Sometimes they get those things back with a greater appreciation.
And sometimes they don’t.
Sometimes the “knows” are not for you to know. But instead, for you to grow.


6 Comments Add yours

  1. purplek828 says:

    Well said my friend! Funny how when things are going well we think we’re in control. Then when things get tricky we realize we were never in control!

  2. Amber says:

    Loved this! Xo

  3. Love this and you! Well said my nearest and dearest. And you are right, so many of us get the whole happy train wrong. I’m amazed at the way God is transforming you. XXOO

  4. Sally says:

    There is something about God calling you away from the sweet protection that Valley Bible provided for so many years to stand alone, fully surrendered and walking by faith that is both frightening and exhilarating! We’ve grown in both our walk with God AND our walk with each other. But it’s been HARD; very hard. And I so often have to remind myself that momentary light affliction is producing in me an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison! So keep on keepin on sister!

    1. *momentary* is the word we often forget. If we just treated it like a reeeaalllyyy long labor we might focus on the reunion with the sweet baby that came to save us more!

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